Beginnings

I wrote this a couple of weeks ago.

Today has to be a new beginning for me.

I've just got back from a week in New York which started as the worst of times and became the best of times. I have managed to break an attachment to a lover that was causing me all the pain and humiliation of asynchronous love.

I had been Molly's lover since the summer of 2005. I met her at a conference in Canada where we had one of those encounters that often take place at those sort of residential meetings far from home where much alcohol (and sometimes other substances) gets consumed. She is Australian, direct, funny and, I thought at the time, amazingly honest about sexuality and relationships. While I liked her, I had no intention of 'falling in love' and thought that we were just enjoying a two-night stand.

She was one of the very few women that I'd felt I could talk to about my sexuality in a completely frank way, so I did. I thought of myself in those days as a frustrated submissive who had never found the right woman. Molly, though very interested in sex and sexuality had never really thought about or understood bdsm or fetish. She'd taken a workshop with Barbara Carrellas, New York's famous tantric sex teacher but this was new to her.

She became obsessed by me, fascinated with D/s and determined to find out more. On her return to Australia she bought books, talked to friends and undertook research with a determination which I now recognise as being entirely characteristic.

I will publish her account of our first real encounter as Mistress and slave in a couple of days.